Of Trust and How It Plays a Part in My Life

This time around, in the @Ecotrain Question of the Week details here, @eco-alex has posed a question on trust.

TRUST. Perhaps the most important thing in a relationship and to our heart and soul... Trust is the bedrock of many relationships whether they be with family, friends or work colleagues. In life we have to trust others in so many ways, and often times we have to rely on trust so that we can survive and prosper. There are so many kinds of trust and we do so, sometimes blindly, even when our lives depend on it! We trust a driver of a bus to safely take us to our destination. We trust our family and friends with our secrets and feelings. We trust our governments to do the right thing. We trust our doctors to heal us. Who we place our trust in is so important, and in this world of secrets, ulterior motives, and deceit it is so important who we trust because our very lives and well-being can depend on it.

Personally, I tend to be fairly trusting, giving people the benefit of the doubt. Now, if they deceive me or act in an untrusting manner, I may over look it once or twice but never a third time. They have lost my trust and will have to earn it back. I will not totally dismiss a person, never giving them another chance, but they have to merit my opening up to them. If I am really being trusting, I am being vulnerable and I would not become like that with someone who is not worthy.

Now if they were to show themselves to be of very poor character, I would not want anything to do with them. The author and motivational speaker Jim Rohn once said

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.

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I want to be fairly careful who I spend my precious time with.

The fact that I mostly move in circles of trust worthy people may be why I am so trusting.

Now put me in different circumstances, like the inner city crowds, would I be as trusting or would my radar go up and I'd become more wary.

I was reading @stortebeker 's response to this question and he had this to say about the big cities

relate the urban area to a jungle, where power and money rule, but shrewdness and a ruthless attitude could lead to money and power. And if someone happened to be too trusting, it was them who'd be first taken advantage of.

I don't do well in cities and I think I would mostly stay away from those areas or have my husband there, who has more street smarts, to protect me.

Speaking of my husband, the person I see myself living the rest of my life with, we started with a romantic attraction (actually, rather like love at first sight) but our marriage commitment did not happen right away. We spent a lot of time together, getting to know each other and allowing a friendship to develop, with trust and respect. Once that was in place then we moved in with each other (I married the guy next door) and began building a life together - that takes a lot of trust!

Also in the rural, forest community that I live in, the people there built their homes and the community together. I would trust the members of the community to stand together against any adversities. That can give you a real sense of security, especially when there is so much unrest in the world.

I am grateful for the people around me, who are my friends and family, whom I can trust. I feel for those who may not have that in their life. Without trust I think it could be lonely and quite difficult. And what about love? Can there be a loving relationship without trust? It seems pretty essential to me and it takes a certain strength to open yourself up and become vulnerable with someone. Perhaps it takes some faith that they will not harm you, but will love and care for you.

Trust can be very freeing, letting you open up and let all sorts of feelings in. It can also be quite powerful, something I am happy to have in my life!